Sweetiesville
by Bloodlustful
Summary: Post-series story. After yet another day where his luck runs true to form, Furrball starts to believe that both Acme Acres and the world would have been better off if he'd never existed. It's up to Calamity Coyote to show him that isn't true and how vital he is. Parody and spoof of "It's A Wonderful Life" and "It's A Wonderful Tiny Toons Christmas Special".
1. Chapter 1

Hello, fellow TTA fans! I'm back with a brand new fanfic for the Tiny Toon Adventures franchise! What am I doing this time around, you ask? Why, I'm having it so that the ever so unlucky but ever so lovable and warm-hearted Furrball is, after having an despondency episode which leaves him thinking the world would be better off if he never came into existence, shown by Calamity Coyote, who has agreed to act as his guardian of sorts, and has, by both Furrball's mentor, Sylvester The Cat, as well as his own Wile. E Coyote, been promised a real voice to speak openly with if he succeeds in showing Furrball how important he is to Acme Acres and the world of TTA, just how wrong a way to think that is. As well as how much worse the world would have been without him. Very obviously, this is a parody and spoof of the classic Frank Capra film "It's A Wonderful Life". In addition, since I've done parody fics of that movie before, not to mention since Buster officially got a parody in the final regular TTA episode of that movie in "It's A Wonderful Tiny Toon Christmas Special", I felt it was high time that Furrball got one of his very own, given how popular, sweet, cute and wonderful(HA!)he is. Even if it is in the form of a two-chapter fanfic and not an actual TTA episode.

THINGS TO NOTE:

One of the many reasons I was spurred to do this is because I made one such fic as this for Fifi La Fume, and Furrball's amount of fans and sympathetic qualities are both comparable to hers. Just like the hardships he goes through, lovable traits he's got, raw deals he receives and his state of being underused and unhappy rivals hers. Additionally, they make a superb couple, so this fic is meant to both parody "It's A Wonderful Life", be a nod to "It's A Wonderful Tiny Toons Christmas Special", serve as a male equivalent to the parody fic like this I did for Fifi and be, in the end, a catering to FifiXFurrball fans.

Like the majority of TTA fanfics I write, this one takes place post-series. About four weeks after the series finale of TTA. Whether this is the final normal episode or the final special is up to you, but in any event, I've made my point. Four weeks after the end of it.

I own none of the characters. They all belong to TTA. I don't own "It's A Wonderful Life", either, nor do I own the parody of that movie done in the TTA episode "It's A Wonderful Tiny Toons Christmas Special". They belong to their respective owners.

I chose to title this story "Sweetiesville" because Sweetie would undoubtedly take over everything and rule as a tyrant queen if Furrball wasn't there to keep her distracted, and I also chose to do so because it'll very perfectly paint and show Sweetie for the unlikable little bitch that she is(especially since the majority of TTA fans hate her, so this will surely please them). Ironically, that's in one world. In the other, the original one, Sweetie actually exhibits feelings unlike her true self, but I digress. Sweetiesville, obviously a parody of "Pottersville". As well as of "Montyville", the name of the world without Buster in "It's A Wonderful Tiny Toon Christmas Special". Anyway, on with the story.

Sweetiesville

Chapter 1-Sad Cat

Although Furrball was well known for what rotten luck he had, how he constantly got the short end of the stick and the rawest of raw deals despite how sweet, lovable, nice, kind, caring, cute, thoughtful, endearing, adorable, peaceful, warm-hearted and innocent he was, he was, on this day, at what could be considered his lowest point. And that was quite a statement, with all he got put through on a daily basis, albeit fully undeservedly. You see, he'd initially been doing real well for someone of his proneness to misfortune, ironically enough. He'd gotten straight A's and had done beautifully in gym class both in regular sports and wrestling, the latter of which he did with the likes of Sweetie, Elmyra Duff, Fowlmouth, Lil' Sneezer, Byron Basset, Roderick Rat, Rhubella Rat, Danforth Drake and Margot Mallard(the latter four obviously visiting from that school Perfecto Prep to compete with Acme Loo along with Acme Loo competing in wrestling against each other). To his surprise, as well as theirs, he defeated them all handily, one by one, which was the lineup of wrestling in this round of it in the Acme Loo school gym. Not just with him, but with all who were wrestling one opponent or the other, from one school or the other. As if all this and the aforementioned straight A's in every class weren't enough, he was even able to catch and save one of Calamity Coyote's experiment chemical vials when he happened by where the coyote was working at the time Little Beeper ran by the desk to make it fall to the floor as the means to a prank. Calamity thanked him happily for it, albeit with a sign that said: "Can't thank you enough! Way to save my work, pal!" but Furrball's luck was just about to run true to its well known, less than favorable form despite all of this.

How so? Well, Sweetie was vexed that Furrball had beaten her in wrestling, indicating he would have devoured her long ago if his luck wasn't so bad, and Beeper was equally annoyed on account of his prank being ruined by Furrball. Yeah, none of the other ones who Furrball beat in wrestling were happy about losing, either, but Sweetie in particular for the reasons mentioned. In any event, Sweetie was able to keep herself under control due to admitting to herself she had, of course, started the whole thing between her and Furrball with trying to get him to eat her when he was just minding his own business and then making him suffer more when he finally snapped. And Beeper was able to keep himself under control due to Furrball not being a usual rival he had like Calamity was for him. But despite this and Byron, Elmyra, Fowlmouth and Sneezer keeping themselves in check about their feelings of losing to Furrball in wrestling, each one for different reasons and Byron and Sneezer with slightly more difficulty than the other two for obvious and predictable reasons, Rhubella, Roderick, Margot and Danforth were far more angry and vengeful as well as considerably more pissed off and vindictive than those others mentioned just now. It'd lead to them sitting down and having a meeting, the way cheating didn't help them win this time like it usually did.

Roderick said: "Dammit, I can't believe we all lost to that cat! Since when is unlucky fraidy cat Furrball so formidable?" "Could be how well he'd do in a fight if he wasn't so damn unfortunate pushing through. Just my theory." Rhubella spoke. "You could very well be right, but I digress." Margot spoke. "Because even with that being so, our talent at cheating should've worked this time like it has all the other times!" Danforth put across. "Exactly! We've got to make that pathetic blue kitten suffer for humiliating us like that!" Roderick went. "I'm really surprised all his other opponents in wrestling aren't feeling like we are, especially the canary and the mouse, but whatever! It's just us, so it's just us." "So what do you suggest we do as payback, Roddy?" Rhubella asked. "Simple, Ruby." Roderick replied. "We cause such a terrible fate to be made to befall him that he loses all his spirit and wishes he were never born!" "Hell yeah! That's the perfect idea!" shouted out Danforth, but Rhubella and Margot immediately stood up and then backed away. "Hey, whoa." Ruby said. "Nuh-uh. No way. I'm all for being bad, and I love to see to it Acme Losers are made to suffer and/or be humiliated, Roddy, but the point that they wish to never have been born and possibly become suicidal? Even a bitch like me draws the line there." A comment from Margot came out as: "Ditto for me. Embarrass Furrball and cause him pain of some kind? Count me in. But to that great of an extent? Nothing doing." "So if you boys wanna break his spirit that badly and possibly cause him to kill himself, go ahead. But we're having no part of it." Ruby added. "Fine. Be a couple of sissy bitches. See what I care." Roddy sneered, an instant before saying: "Come on, Danforth." He and the drake moved forward to discuss just the way to put their plan into action perfectly, and Ruby and Margot left to get a shake or something to block out what they knew their respective boyfriends would do.

They almost pitied Furrball…though not quite, since they were Perfecto Prep girls and of course disliked him along with all others at Acme Loo(or, as they would call them, Acme Losers, but I digress), but they just blocked this whole thing out of their minds and went for whatever the two of them would do before returning to Perfecto Prep, knowing that their boyfriends would so very likely be back there by then, having gotten their deed at Acme Loo done, and they needed a way to make how they'd have to listen to them gloat about what they'd done to Furrball for God only knows how long a time more bearable. Anyway, back to Acme Loo, Furrball was on his way, at this time, to the class of his favorite professor. Namely, Sylvester. Just as he was about to open the door, Roddy and Danforth quietly and sneakily(to say nothing of quickly, as so to make sure neither he nor anyone else would see them)tied a rope to Furrball's tail and tied the other end of said rope to the Acme Loo trophy case display on the wall, in a way so, when he tried to walk forward, not only would it have enough of itself pulled off so that it fell to the ground, but it would create an impact when falling to cause the trophies to fly in all directions and cause other kinds of damage. Furrball wasn't aware of any of this, and understandably, since the both of the bastards stayed well hidden and unseen, but by the time they'd escaped from where they were as well as taken off through a door and then a window of one room to being outside as so to escape back to Perfecto Prep via running, it had all been set into motion. So no sooner did Furrball open the door to Sylvester's class than did he feel a nasty yank on his tail, and disaster struck!

Indeed, the trophy display case got part of itself ripped off and the rest of it fell to the floor from this, Furrball's rotten luck rearing its ugly head as the glass shattered, the trophies flew in all directions, some of them damaging other wall displays, others breaking windows and a few hitting or nearly hitting other students, no fatal or serious damage caused, but certainly an awful lot of pain. Everyone, including Furrball himself, was shocked beyond belief, and Furrball got startled when he saw there was a rope tied to his tail. Everyone looked at him and the rope, all just as confused as he was as to what could have happened, but Furrball was also embarrassed and traumatized by this. He couldn't believe this had happened, and so suddenly and without any warning, at that. He'd just wanted to enter Sylvester's class, but now all of a sudden this had just occurred somehow. Furrball's heart was pounding fast, and though the look on his face and how still he was made it evident to everyone else, hurt by flying trophy or not, that he had not by any means intended for this to happen and had no idea how it could have happened, nor was in any way expecting it to, he still didn't know what to do until something in his brain spurred him to cut the rope on his tail and clean up the mess he'd inadvertently made as much as possible. He'd get to work doing just that, in a stressed out rush, and while he did get help from the others, plus one of the others, Buster, went to inform Principal Bugs what had happened and how he thought someone had tried to set Furrball up or some shit, it still took quite some time to clean the mess and then to explain everything to everyone who needed to know about it.

Once his ordeal had at last ended(to the extent it could), and Principal Bugs had made it so he would do all he could to find out who'd done this and why, Furrball, drained from how so very profusely he apologized to everyone, especially those who'd hurt during all this, and how it being that they forgave him and made it clear it wasn't his fault was something of a comfort, but not as much as it should have been due to how he could tell his luck was once more up to its old, cruel tricks at his expense, as well as from how much effort he needed to put into cleaning up his unintended and unexpected mess, finally was able to enter Sylvester's class. Still, Sylvester, even having learned of this and helped as much as he could along with Furrball and everyone else and then returning to his desk once it was over and he knew he needed to, was a bit surprised to see the state Furrball was currently in. He knew he'd be wiped out, tired and still somewhat unhappy after all of this, but he wasn't expecting to see him looking like his internal battery has been fully pulled out of him and also looking sadder and more upset and misery-stricken than he ever had in his life, which was saying something, indeed. Furrball glumly and morosely sat down into his chair, with the other students who would have attended this class at this time not present due to how what had happened had made it so, as much as they pitied Furrball, it did not extend to them being able to sit in his presence after what had just happened, given they couldn't help but think him a bad luck charm who was jinxed and would be jinxing all around him at this point.

Plus, they knew he probably didn't want anyone to see him right now outside of Sylvester due to his knowing he was the teacher and that he was someone Furrball could trust and vice versa, so they felt that they were doing both him and themselves alike a big favor by not being present in the class of Sylvester right now. Anyway, Sylvester said: "Furrball, hi. Look, I can tell you're distraught and distressed after what happened, but we both know it wasn't your fault, and so does everyone else in this school. Principal Bugs is currently trying to find out who did this and why, so the culprits can be punished for what they did to you." "I know, I know, professor." Furrball replied quietly, in one of the few instances he ever spoke. "But even so, I was doing all sorts of things so beautifully. I thought maybe I was something other than a disaster waiting to happen or a time bomb of jinxed bad luck waiting to go off. Maybe that things were finally and at long last looking up for me. But now I've inadvertently caused harm to others, even if nothing serious, and I've unwittingly wrecked a whole trophy displayed case and some other important and irreplaceable things on the walls. Seriously, in one way or the other, at one time or another, I only cause disasters and get beat up upon by someone or something. Fortune just doesn't favor me or anyone around me. And you know something, professor?" "Yes, Furrball?" Sylvester then asked, looking concerned due to what Furrball had said and the tone of voice he was using, since it couldn't possibly mean anything good. Furrball then sighed and said: "By this point, I'm really starting to think that all of Acme Acres, and the world, for that matter, would be better off if I'd never come into existence."

"Whoa, Furrball!" Sylvester exclaimed. "You mustn't say such things! Especially since thoughts like that are quite dangerous to have and it's extremely unhealthy to think that way!" "But professor," Furrball protested, "look at all the crap that occurs whenever I'm around! And not only do I get nailed all the time, as if the universe has something against me for nothing, but anyone in my vicinity gets hurt, too! Look what happened today when I was trying to come in here, for crying out loud! And since my instincts are something I can't help, those who are near or around me are in danger if I suddenly get hungry or feel like I need to defend myself from one thing or the other! And all the rotten things Sweetie's done just because, until recently, she could not accept the fact it was her fault we were enemies, and thus caused as much destruction and as much pain as possible just torturing and/or trying to get rid of me! Seriously, with that and all the others who've either been on the throwing or receiving end of the worst Acme Acres has to offer just for happening to be in my presence with neither me nor them expecting it, I cannot see it in any other way. If I wasn't around, then there's a good chance a lot of the shit that befalls Acme Acres wouldn't happen. That I'm always getting struck by misfortune and beat up by each and every object, person or animal around only further magnifies my wish I had never been born at all." Sylvester walked away from his desk, looked Furrball right in the eyes and said: "Furrball, you must be careful what you wish for, boy. After all, it just might come true." "Well, why do you think I'm wishing I never existed in the first place?" Furrball asked." "All right, you clearly need to take the rest of the day off, the way you're feeling right now, so go home. I'll let the rest of the school know you were told to do so by me for your own good." Furrball nodded and then got up again, walking out the door of the class and making his way to the doors of Acme Loo the students there entered and exited by.

As Furrball was making his way home to the alley he lived in, Sylvester, back in his class and thinking of a way to help his favorite student, used his phone to call both Wile E. Coyote and Calamity Coyote. After the two coyotes entered into his classroom following said phone call, the black and white cat stated his business. "Wile E, I wish for your top student, namely Calamity here, to please help my top student, Furrball. You see, after the unexpected destruction sequence of a chance happenstance, he's been made to snap after so many years of getting the short end of the stick and believe the world would be a better place without him, be it Acme Acres or any of the other places on Earth. I believe that it would be best of Calamity could somehow show him just how false that assumption is and why he's important to Acme Acres and the rest of the world we live in." Wile E, in one of his few times of talking, said: "That sounds like a fine idea, but do you agree to this, Calamity?" Calamity held up a sign which said: "I'll gladly do it. Furrball is a good friend of mine, and only a while ago today he saved one of my experiments." He held up a second sign which said: "Plus, he's been through too much already, and besides how he's a nice, sweet guy, no one deserves to go through what he's going through." "Splendid." Wile E said. In addition, Sylvester went: "I am glad you agree to it. Succeed in convincing him he shouldn't be wishing he wasn't around, and me and Wile E will see to it you're granted the ability to talk. No more of having to hold up all those signs or having difficulty on the phone." Calamity's face lit up a second before he held up a sign that said: "All the more reason for me to do this. Where is Furrball now?" Sylvester replied: "He's currently at his alley home. I told him to take the rest of the day off so that he could come to grips with his mood and start thinking straight again. I'm of the intent to tell much the same to the rest of the school."

Calamity nodded and Wile E held up a sign that said: "I'll help with that part. You go on and help Furrball, Calamity." Calamity nodded, held up a sign which read: "Will do." and took off to the entrance/exit doors of Acme Loo. He subsequently made his way to the alley Furrball lived in. Since he and Furrball were good friends, they sometimes visited each other. So he knew how to get to Furrball's alley. Well, it turned out he got there just in time! Because as he saw, to his horror, once he was there, Furrball had just finished up saying numerous prayers which asked for forgiveness from God for what he was about to do. Because what he was about to do was see to it he took his own life via slitting his wrists and throat with his claws! Just as he was about to do so, Calamity leapt in front of him, startling the blue cat, and held up a sign which said only a single word, but said word said it all. "STOP!" Furrball almost jumped out of his skin/fur, but in the next instant, Calamity held up a sign that said: "Were you going to kill yourself?" Furrball let out a quite meow of sadness as he nodded, then he whispered: "I'm sorry, but I don't have one thing left to live for." "Oh, you have plenty to live for." a sign Calamity then held up said. "It might not seem that way right now," another sign he held up read, "but believe me, you're truly making a mistake here. A big one." He held up a third sign, which said: "I was sent by both your mentor, Sylvester, and my own, Wile E. Coyote, to show you how crucial and vital you are to the world, Acme Acres or otherwise." Finally, he held up a fourth sign which said: "I am going to be making a device which will take us to that world. Please come with me as I teach you how very important you are, indeed."

Furrball, able to tell it just wouldn't be right to commit suicide now, sighed and agreed to Calamity's intentions with a nod. So Calamity held up a sign that said: "Smart move." a second before he got to work with his invention. Since he was as much of a genius and talent at the art of inventing things as he was, it should be no surprise it did not take him long to get it done. And as soon as it was done, he held up a sign that said: "Finished! All right, pussycat, let's get started on our trip here. Grab my hand!" He held out his free hand, which Furrball took hold of, then he got his device activated after pressing buttons and pulling levers with his free hand so that they'd get taken to exactly the world Calamity was aiming for. And once he was finished, that's exactly the happenstance that occurred, with them being teleported there by the device. Calamity had also, of course, made sure he did the sequence he'd done in a way so, whenever they needed to be at once teleported somewhere else, the device, despite remaining behind in the alley, would do just that for them. Back in Acme Loo, with everyone having learned of Furrball's plight, there wasn't a single individual in the school who wasn't feeling at least some extent of pity for Furrball. As in, even the likes of Sweetie and Lil' Sneezer couldn't help but feel a LITTLE sympathy for him in spite of their history, though ironically, Sweetie started the whole thing between Furrball and herself by trying to keep getting him to eat her so he'd be evicted while he was just minding his own business, plus Furrball only attacked her and/or Sneezer out of an instinct to survive and the hunger he felt, not any kind of malice or evil, but I digress. If those two could garner pity for the blue alley cat, imagine how everyone else was taking pity on him. Especially Fifi La Fume, who had, as of late, fallen in love with Furrball. Though he'd fallen in love with her, as well, neither had admitted it to the other, each for their own reasons, though in both cases, they were perfectly understandable and sound reasons.

Since everyone had also learned of how Calamity had been sent to help Furrball in the process of learning from Sylvester why he wasn't here, Shirley spoke for everyone when she said: "Like, I hope Calamity can convince Furrball of what a mistake he's making, wishing so ill of himself." Fifi agreed with her-also speaking for everyone present-when she said: "Oui, eet ees not right for zis to be happeneeng to heem or anyone. Nobody should go through zis at all." All of the others didn't bother saying a word, since Shirley and Fifi had pretty much covered all of everything for everyone, with one exception. Babs saw Buster come back from what was clearly his trip with Principal Bugs to find evidence of who could have caused this to happen and made it so Furrball created the accident that he did, and she said: "Buster? Principal Bugs? Did either of you find anything, perchance?" "We're afraid not, Babsy." Buster replied. "Yep, hate to say it, but nada. Zilch. Zero." Bugs answered, shaking his head. "Damn, that's a shame." Babs sighed. A second later, she said: "Listen, guys, there's something I have to fill the two of you in on." As they were on the lookout for clues, they were the last two who weren't aware of what had been made to happen with Furrball like everyone else knew now. So Babs informed them of what had occurred and what they needed to know, and once she was done, Buster said: "Thanks for letting us know, Babsy." "Thanks, indeed," Bugs added, "but heaven help Furrball right now, and may God be with him, and hopefully Calamity's goal will be met with success." "It had best be, for Furrball's sake." Babs nodded.

TO BE CONTINUED…

How did you like this first chapter? Rate and review, everyone, especially you Furrball fans!


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, here I am with the second and concluding chapter of this story! As you saw in the last chapter, Furrball had gotten despondent and was about to kill himself, but Calamity quickly intervened and made sure he wouldn't do that. Subsequently, he invented a special device to take him and Furrball to a world in which Furrball had never existed, and now he intends to show Furrball just how much he matters and how much worse off the world would have been were he never to have been created, born and/or made to exist. If he succeeds, then not only will Furrball see the truth and get his confidence restored, thereby ensuring he will not take his own life and the scheme by Roderick Rat and Danforth Drake will not succeed, but Calamity will be given a voice and talking ability of his own by Furrball's mentor, Sylvester, and his own mentor, Wile E. Coyote. Can he succeed? Will Roddy and Danforth get what-for after what they did? Will this end on a good note? Read on to find out! This chapter will be quite a bit longer than the one of before, but I can assure you, it's quite the good one, so it's a good kind of long.

I own none of the characters. They all belong to Tiny Toon Adventures. And I don't own the movie the plot parodies "It's A Wonderful Life", nor the original, official TTA parody of that movie, "It's A Wonderful Tiny Toons Christmas Special". They all belong to their respective owners.

Sweetiesville

Chapter 2-Importance Realization

Okay, on to where Furrball and Calamity were at the moment here. They had just gotten a ways into the destination that Calamity's new invention had taken them to. Furrball was, at first, confused, as it looked just like where they'd been, though he suddenly noticed that not only was the bandage on his tail gone, but so was the notch in his ear! "Whoa…" Furrball exclaimed. "My tail bandage is gone, and so is my ear notch!" Calamity held up a sign which read: "That's right. Because in this world, you were never born and therefore don't exist, so it would be impossible for you to have distinguishing features like that." He held up another sign that said: "Now, let's get moving here." He let go of Furrball's hand but motioned his own for Furrball to follow him, which Furrball did as Calamity walked forward to the first part of this place they'd check out. It would be none other than the entrance sign to what was once Acme Acres. Only now, the sign in question did not read Acme Acres. It read "Sweetiesville". Furrball then asked: "Sweetiesville? I thought this was Acme Acres!" "Used to be." a sign which Calamity held up said. Then held up a second one which read: "Not anymore, though. Sweetie took over this place and this show many years ago, and she's been ruling it both tyrannically and with an iron wing ever since. True to her egotistical, bitchy and obnoxious form, she had the name of the town named after her. Hence the current name of this place." Furrball felt a twinge of disgust. He knew Sweetie was a rotten little hellspawn, but he never thought she'd come to a level of nastiness and narcissism this high. But since they had to enter, they did so, and once inside Sweetiesville, they started to take a look all around the place.

First, they moved into the road that connected to the entranceway, and they soon saw two grieving, homeless people, who were apparently spouses, since it was one man and one woman of about the same age and wearing similar clothes, and Calamity held up a sign that said: "By any chance, do you recognize either of those people?" At first, Furrball couldn't quite tell who in the world they were and why Calamity had pointed them out just now. But all of a sudden, he did indeed recognize them and see why Calamity had pointed them out to him. They were none other than the parents of that homeless peasant boy who Furrball had consoled after the same rich snob of a heartless father who lived in the apartment he looked into the window of and had just scant seconds ago tossed Furrball out shut the curtain on said window, being just as unwelcoming to the poor boy as he was to Furrball. Of course, much like the little kitten who he had seen in that apartment, Furrball's other friend in there, the little girl, was kind to him and had attempted to be kind to the boy, but her father was having none of it, just like neither he nor her mother nor either of the sweet kitten's parents were having any of Furrball being in there. But Furrball was really confused as to why the boy was nowhere to be seen, since when he and the boy hugged and then became friends, they were both in close vicinity of his parents. So he went over and asked them: "Excuse me?" They turned and saw him, with the homeless father going: "A cat? Who can talk? What's going on here?" Then the mother said: "He doesn't look familiar at all. I don't think he's ever been seen anywhere, here or otherwise."

"What?" Furrball asked. "But…but your son…that little boy who looked into the window of that apartment building…was greeted nicely by the little girl who lived there…but got shut on out by the father who lived there…" "Our son?" wept the mother, shedding some fresh new tears just then. The father then put in: "Our son has been dead for some time. Because after he got shut out by that awful man despite his daughter trying to welcome our son, he sat on the sidewalk and died of heartbreak." Furrball's eyes opened wide, and then the father continued: "We were trying to keep warm from fire barrels at the time, but when we turned to see our son on the sidewalk, he was dead." The father shed more tears, and the mother went on: "And the reason we turned to see him was that we heard his last words, said sobbingly, just as the sadness and depression took his sweet, innocent little life. He said that he wished he at least a friend and someone to comfort him, but he could tell that would never happen and that he'd be always alone." Furrball's eyes, at that moment, started to brim with tears. He was the one who comforted the little boy in question, making it so that, even if they didn't have the best lives or much of anything, they still had each other, and that was enough to restore the boy's spirit from his state of disheartenment. But given he was never born in this reality, the boy didn't have anyone at all, and he died of depression just moments after the rejection by the cruel father of the ironically sweet and nice little girl!

"Say, why are you starting to tear up? You know nothing about any of this!" the mother of the dead peasant boy exclaimed. "Yes, you never even were seen anywhere around here." put in the father, with Furrball replying: "But…in the world I come from…I comforted your son and we had each other…I cheered him up…shared a half-eaten can of fish with him…we hugged…" in a stammering manner, but the father asked: "What the hell do you mean the world you come from?" "This is the only world there is!" the mother added. "And if there is such a world, if you did give our son the consoling in question in that world, it certainly didn't happen here!" "After all, how could it? Nothing like you was ever in this world!" the father added. Calamity then did a tap on Furrball's shoulder and held up a sign that said: "See? If it wasn't for you, that innocent little peasant boy would have died of depression and sadness!" He held up another and it said: "I think it's now time to enter the apartment." He pointed to the apartment Furrball had attempted to enter, only to get kicked out of. Furrball didn't like revisiting the place where he got treated so badly by everyone but the nice little girl and her sweet kitten, but he knew he'd need to do so, so he sucked it up and he and Calamity both entered. The home looked just as it did, and it wasn't at all long before Furrball and Calamity found both the cruel parents of the place and the two just as cruel older white cats. Furrball's ears tensed back in a rage…he knew that, despite the kindness he was shown by the daughter of the humans and the kitten of the older cats, their parents were not a bit like their children, and in fact were as cruel and heartless as their children were kind and loving. How such a nice girl and a sweet kitten could have such pitiless parents puzzled Furrball to no end. But he knew he'd have to control his rage, since in this reality, he never lived, so none of them had a clue who he was.

"What in God's name?" the father human asked. "Who are those two fleabags, and what are they doing in our house?" the mother human let out. Furrball would now learn that, unlike in his original world, this world had it so the two heartless cats could talk just as easily as their vile owners, as the father cat said: "Well, your guess is as good as mine, but they sure aren't welcome here, especially that blue cat who looks suspiciously like an alley cat!" "That's because I am one, you bastard!" Furrball spat. "My, quite the sharp mouth he's got, too!" the mother cat said. "Just like our daughter would have gotten if she'd gotten the treatment we did!" "What are you talking about, you bitch?" Furrball cried out. "First of all, cool it with the insults." snapped the father cat nastily. "You are an alley cat and have no right to give any lip to anyone, least of all the rich elite rankers such as us!" "Second of all," the mother cat put across, "for your information, after that pink canary called Sweetie took over Acme Acres and renamed it Sweetiesville, she needed two 24-7 assistants as close to her own age as she could find. She promised us that, if we would have my daughter and the daughter of our owners be put into that position for her, she would give us, my mate and I, the ability to talk like our owners can with a special medicine she made!" "So we gave them to her." the father cat put across. "That's right. Our daughter, as well as the kitten of our cats, are Sweetie's reluctant assistants around the clock." said the mother human. "And now our two older cats can talk with the special medicine in question Sweetie gave them, and it's two less mouths to feed for us, too."

Furrball could not believe what he was hearing. "YOU GAVE AWAY YOUR OWN CHILDREN?! TO ASSIST SWEETIE IN HER TAKEOVER OF THIS PLACE AGAINST THEIR WILLS? TO LIGHTEN YOUR LOAD AND TO MAKE YOUR CATS ABLE TO BE TALKING?! WHAT KIND OF SOULLESS, DEPRAVED ANATHEMAS ARE YOU?!" "It comes as quite the surprise to us that a filthy alley cat could be so brazen." the father human put across. "And additionally, we've had quite enough of the likes of the poor trying to find a home in our place." the mother human put across. "Are you talking about that little boy who looked in your window before?" Furrball asked. "Because if you are, you should know he died of sadness and depression after the curtain got shut on him!" Every word became more profound, angry and sharp, to say nothing of more biting, as he said this, and the mother cat spoke: "Well, good damn riddance to him, then! Maybe it will serve a lesson to those who dare darken our home!" "Fuck you, bitch!" Furrball shouted. "In the world I'm from, he's alive because I comforted him and in addition shared canned fish with him, making it so we had each other, if nothing else! After your male human owner tossed me out when his daughter and your kitten tried to welcome me! All the two of you older cats did was abuse me and treat me like trash, while your owners refused to let me stay!" "The world he's from?" asked the father cat. "What is this lunatic talking about?" "Lunatic!" Furrball exclaimed. "That's rich, coming from you, seeing as how you'd sell away your own kitten for the ability to talk like a human!" "Well, I don't know if that world exists or not, but even if it does, we've never seen him before in this one and how he even knows us, let alone can accuse our owners and us two of doing what he's accused us of, is something which in no way adds up!" the mother cat put across.

"Well, in one world or the other, whatever happened, you aren't welcome here and your grey coyote friend isn't, either, so get hearts out of here! Now!" the mother human demanded. A reply from Furrball of: "Funny you should tell me to get 'hearts out of here', bitch, since a heart is something you, your husband and your cats seriously lack!" later, and he and Calamity were on their way out the doors, with the mother cat calling: "And by the way, you never existed here until now, and it would have been better if you continued not to exist now and forever, filth!" It enraged Furrball and Calamity even further to hear this, but they had to continue their journey, so they walked on, with Calamity holding up a sign that said: "As you just learned, Sweetie got her two assistants in the form of those who least deserved or wanted the position after her takeover in a world you never lived in, and the already heartless parents of the two innocents in question became at least ten times the monsters they ever were." Another sign he held up read: "Our next stop is going to be Fifi La Fume's junkyard." Furrball felt a twinge of pain and sadness when he heard this, remembering how he was in love with Fifi and vice versa in his world, but also just as well remembering how Fifi had gotten a broken heart after what she thought was her true love of a skunk(actually him with a stripe painted down his back by mistake)was gone, plus, if things got as bad as they were shown to be thus far, he didn't want to imagine how it would turn out with it being as it was with what he'd see in Fifi's case. And sure enough, when they got to her junkyard via teleportation from Calamity's device and then went right into the car she lived in, both would come across a Fifi La Fume who was a far cry in a figurative AND literal sense, from what either Furrball or Calamity remembered or knew her as.

Because she was not only looking unkempt, sad and like all the spirit, cheer and shine had been drained out of her, but her cosmetics and makeup kits were replaced with numerous containers of various sharp objects. The cuts all over her body, whether they were bandaged or not, suggested self-harm, which she had clearly inflicted on herself repeatedly with one sharp instrument or another in order to make the hellish dystopia that was now her life more bearable. And her eyes looked like she hadn't slept in days. Just as her fur was filthy and she had lost so much weight that she looked almost skeletal. "Fifi? Is that you?" Furrball asked. Fifi turned to see who'd said that and she said: "Hmmm? Who are vous? Bonjour, monsieur, but I don't zink I've evair seen vous at all, and what breengs vous here? And how do vous know mon name?" A reply from Furrball came out as: "Fifi, it's me! Furrball! We go to the same school together! You once mistook me for a skunk and chased me incessantly until what made you mistake me for one was painted over with blue, since it was a white stripe of paint, and I took pity on you when you became heartbroken, thinking your true love was gone! But I painted white stripes on two other cats, much bigger than me, so you would have two 'skunks' to love and I would be safe from the cats in question, who were trying to kill me! It was a favor done for us both! And we're now in love at Acme Loo! At least all this happened in my world, anyway!" "Le sigh…" Fifi said sadly. "I am sorry to say zat I cannot remember any of zat, nor do I know of any such world at all like the one vous speak of. For zis is the only world zere is, and eet ees hell on earth for me and all of everyone! Le boo hoo…le sob…le really big sob…one of zese days, I'm actually goeeng to go beyond self harm and end my life at last." "Fifi, you can't say that! This isn't you!" Furrball let out, but Fifi said: "Eet ees me now, I'm afraid. Wasn't always zat way, but it is now." Furrball's eyes brimmed with tears once more, especially since Fifi's current state was further signified by how grim, dark and colorless her car home looked, so beat up, gone to seed, worn down and just barely in a sufficient state to stay in one piece, like it was on the verge of breaking apart. Much like its skunkette occupant was.

Calamity held up a sign which read: "So you see, now, that without you around, Fifi's life was ruined by how she had been without a true love for so long, and that eventually turned into depression from how she could tell things would never turn out that way for her, and long before what would have been her pursuing me when she thought I was a skunk, so she gave up altogether because there was no one for her to turn to in time." He held up another sign which said: "And look what it led to for the poor girl. It's like her death clock had been kick started. I believe it's time to go." Furrball couldn't help but shed a few tears for Fifi as he took one last look at the sad, crying and despondent skunk and he and Calamity left her home and junkyard. When they were out on the streets again, Calamity held up a sign that said: "Now, I want you to look up at the sky." Furrball did so and opened his eyes widely. He then said: "Oh, my God. It's as polluted as it is filthy. Just like the streets we saw which had so much garbage and pollution all over the place, even if I wasn't surprised like I might have been, since I'm an alley cat and am used to that." "Yes," a sign which Calamity held up said, "when Sweetie took over, she loved to make things as filthy and disgusting as possible everywhere but in her throneroom. So it was not long before Acme Acres got contaminated like this." Furrball clenched his fists at his sides in all out fury, hating Sweetie more than ever, which was saying a lot. He was increasingly regretting the way he wished he'd never been born, but then Calamity spoke: "Now it is time for us to head to Elmyra's house."

Furrball gulped. He couldn't stand Elmyra. Not with the way she acted and/or caused so much harm to so many animals, himself included. And was also one of Sweetie's owners. But it had to be done, so he nodded and did all he could to try and cope with what he knew he'd hate with a vengeance. Calamity's invention teleported them there, and Furrball was surprised to see that not only were Buster, Babs, Plucky, Shirley, Dizzy Devil, Concord Condor, Bookworm, Lil' Sneezer, Fowlmouth, Gogo Dodo and even Hamton all in a cage each, clearly Elmyra's captive and unwilling pets, but Byron Basset was strapped to the couch and Mary Melody was in the suit of a housemaid. "Calamity, what is this?" Furrball asked. Buster then said: "FYI…after she just plain flipped out when Sweetie left her behind after taking over the whole of Acme Acres and all of the world, Elmyra captured and kept as her unwilling pets every animal she could get her little hands on. All of us you see before you, and with Byron, her only remaining original pet, she took desperate measures to make sure he'd never leave her at all." Babs then put in: "Although, who's this you're telling that to, Buster? Sure isn't anyone I recognize." "I don't think I recognize him, either." Plucky agreed. "Like, I think you totally speak for all of us when you say that, or some junk." Shirley added in. "I'm your classmate!" Furrball cried out. "I'm Furrball! I go to the same school of Acme Loo that you do! You guys often label me as unlucky thanks to how I'm so very prone to misfortune and raw deals!" "What the hell is this guy talking about?" Fowlmouth let on out. "We've never seen you before in our lives!" shouted Hamton. "How can you possibly know us or have gone to the same school we did?" Lil' Sneezer asked. "Me confused as shit!" cried on out Dizzy Devil. "It's true! Well, it is in my world!" Furrball said, remembering he never lived in this world. "Your world?" Concord asked. "There's another world this guy's from?" asked Gogo to the others. "Well, apparently, from what he says." Mary Melody then spoke as she came along to dust their cages. "Though it's sure nothing I've ever heard of."

"Mary!" cried out Furrball. "What's with the maid's suit?" "I should think it would be all too obvious." Mary replied morosely. "When Elmyra captured all these animals, she also could tell she'd need a housemaid to clean up after her and/or them, and to keep things tidy in general. As Sweetie, after she took over, made it so I was kicked out of my home so she could replace it with a supersized statue of herself, true to egotistical, selfish, nasty and hellspawn form, I had to take the job in order to have a place to live. Plus, these animals would need someone to help with keeping them safe and/or protected whenever Elmyra showed up to 'love' them, whether she'd be getting carried away or not, whether or not she'd go crazy and put their lives in danger with too much hugging and such, what have you. So I felt this was their best bet. Thus, I've been the housemaid of Elmyra's place ever since, though these animals prefer me to her by a long shot of a country mile, and for good reason. Since I help and protect them, along with how they love me and hate Elmyra to begin with, just like has always been the case. I would, however, like to know how on Earth you know who I am and what you're doing here, especially since this is no place for any animals, especially if they haven't been captured by that dreadful Elmyra." "Well, I…I go by the name of Furrball." Furrball replied. "I was one of your pets for a time, and you didn't want me eating Sweetie while you had us both under your care in your house. You even took me across the USA to try and get my mind off of Sweetie when my instincts to live and eat were all around driving me to try and get her uncontrollably due to my distaste for the dry cat food you'd given me. Ironic she'd act so sweet but screw you over like this the instant that she got the damn chance, since you took such good care of her, she seemed to be your friend and you're worth at least fifty of her and much, much nicer and more likable." "Well, thank you for the compliment, especially since my opinion of Sweetie is less than favorable for obvious reasons these days, but I don't remember any of the interaction we had that you mentioned." Mary replied.

"But you tried to teach me how to swim when we were on the beach after taking me right across the country…" Furrball protested. "Never once did that happen with any animal or me." a reply from Mary came out as, causing Furrball to gasp. "But you had me as your pet cat…almost like your little boy…" Furrball cried out, hating this alternate world he was in more than ever, if it was possible. Mary then sighed: "You must have me confused with someone else, Furrball. It pains me to say this, but I never knew or met anyone like you at all. Nothing like what you have said happened whatsoever, I'm afraid." Furrball shed more tears, now really wishing he had not wished he'd never lived, and only snapped out of it when he saw Elmyra coming, going out: "All right, which one of you cuddwy wuddewies wants to be snuggwed fiwst?" She caught sight of a startled Furrball and Calamity, then she exclaimed: "OOOOOOOOOOH, a pretty-witty kitty! In addition to a cute widdle coyote! I'm gonna hug you and squeeze you and wuv you to itty-bitty pieces!" "I think that's our cue to go!" a sign that Calamity held up said. Byron, who'd heard the happy cries of Elmyra and thus woken up from his sleep, his only escape from her now that he'd been strapped down to the sofa, quickly barked to Furrball and Calamity as if to say: "Never seen the blue cat before in my life, but the exit is that way! Run while you can!" "Thanks!" Furrball a second later let out, while Calamity held up a sign that said: "Thank you!" and both sprinted off. Just as they had gotten out of the doors of Elmyra's house and were about to teleport to their next of destinations, Calamity held up a sign that said: "Now you've learned that your never having at all existed led to Sweetie's taking over Acme Acres, and that led to Elmyra wanting more pets to keep than ever before, thereby ensuring Byron would be less free than ever, and without a friend, like he had in you when he wasn't protecting Sweetie from you, though she's ironically now full well betrayed him and so many others."

He held up another sign that said: "As well as that many of our good friends like you saw in those cages were captured and never to see anything but the inside of those cages and the vile home of Elmyra Duff. And another thing…" "Yes, Calamity?" Furrball asked. Calamity held up a sign that read: "The way you saw Bookworm looking even sadder than the others, which is, to be sure, saying something, when we looked at our friends in those cages? It's because he knew that, after Sweetie took over and found out of Elmyra capturing him and all those other pets, it'd only be a matter of time before he broke enough so he'd want to be eaten by her and she'd get to chow down on him at last. So one way or the other, his life was essentially over. Without you to stalk Sweetie, his life was in a lot more danger than it would be otherwise." Furrball's jaw then dropped, and he couldn't believe this. Especially since Bookworm was an innocent guy and also a helpful friend to the good guys of Acme Acres when they needed it. And he was now at such a point as that of telling Calamity: "Cal, please! I don't want it to be like this anymore! I shouldn't have said what I did! I can now tell I didn't mean it!" "Yes, but I'm afraid there's still more for us to see here, so we have to finish this." Calamity's next sign he held up read. Furrball sighed a second before accepting the inevitable, and, both of them thankful they'd locked the doors after exiting Elmyra's house, they were teleported to where they'd go next by Calamity's device. It'd turn out to be none other than a cheap, small, sleazy little bar which was clearly meant only for those who were only interested in getting fried as soon as possible. "Why are we here, of all the possible places?" Furrball asked Calamity. "Enter and see." the sign Calamity held up read. The two went into the place, and Furrball saw some most unexpected individuals there.

He saw the likes of Little Beeper, Rhubella Rat, Margot Mallard, Bernice Bovine, Julie Bruin and Bimbette Skunk in that bar, all of them getting as many drinks as possible as so to get themselves as wasted as possible, though Beeper, given his speed, was the one who was both the bartender and the server of the drinks, only getting drunk himself when everyone else was drunk as could be. "Oh, my God!" Furrball cried out, and then they all turned to look at him. "Hey, any of you know who the hell that guy is?" asked Bernice. "Well, not me, that's for fucking sure!" let out Margot. "Not the foggiest. Never seen him before in my life." Bimbette put across. "I haven't seen him, either," Julie said, "though he looks to be a blue alley cat." "I am!" Furrball said, with Rhubella stating: "Is that a fact? You have a name?" "I happen to be Furrball!" Furrball told her. "I attend Acme Loo, who you and the rest of Perfecto Prep rival in things like sports and such, and I am an alley cat, just as I look like one!" "How does he know about all of this?" Ruby asked the others. "Your guess is as good as mine, Ruby." Margot replied. Beeper, however, held up a sign that said: "Whatever, none of us have ever seen him before, but it doesn't matter, because if he isn't here to get loaded, then he shouldn't be here to begin with." He held up another sign that read: "Because that's what this place is for. Getting drunk as fast as you can." "Why would any of you want to get drunk in seconds? And so frequently as Little Beeper's suggested happens in this place?" Furrball asked. "Isn't it obvious?" Rhubella snapped. Then Julie put in: "Ever since Sweetie took over and arrogantly renamed Acme Acres as Sweetiesville, she's done a lot more than that in terms of her rotten stunts pulled."

"As in…" Margot told Furrball, "…among other things, including decimating all of this place and as much of the world she now rules as she can, she's made it so her right hand man is Montana Max and two other of her top minions are Roderick Rat and Danforth Drake." "To say nothing a thing of how she had the likes of us just be kicked out of our schools and/or homes in addition to being banished to the lowest of the low when it came to lifestyles and the most piss-poor ways of living. We're barely hanging on, and know we're gonna die early, so we find it to be our best bet to get drunk as often as possible so it won't be so hellish for us." Bimbette put in. Beeper held up a sign that said: "So we got this place turned into what it was now despite how it used to be a marvelous tavern, because Sweetie was having none of it and wrecked everything good about the place despite letting it stay standing, and now we just do all we can to drink our lives away until they finally end and thus so does the relentless pain, hardship and anguish." It saddened, horrified and disheartened Furrball to see all of this, and Calamity then held up a sign that said: "We'll be going now, since neither of us wants to get wasted. Thanks for filling my cat chum here in." Beeper nodded and both Calamity and Furrball left, with Furrball going: "They'd all sunk that low?" "After Sweetie took over and things were made to happen as they were under her rule, yes." Calamity's next sign he held up said. He held up another one which read: "So, if you'd never lived, both the good and not so good alike would have had this happen to them due to the acts of those worse than themselves." Finally, Calamity held up a sign which said: "Now I need to take us to our final destination on this trip. Sweetie's palace and throneroom." Furrball's fury and hatred towards Sweetie, both escalated to greater levels than before for good reason, all came barreling back to him, and he said: "Well, I'm glad it's finally over after this part, but we have to do something about Sweetie and her wicked tyranny!"

Calamity held up a sign that said: "And we're going to. Right now." So they got made to wind up in Sweetie's palace via teleportation by Calamity's special invention, and once in there, Calamity held up a sign that said: "Here we are. Sweetie's palace. The place where the bitchy-ass bird rules with an iron wing and much oppression over what was once Acme Acres, but now, of course, goes by the name of Sweetiesville." Furrball said: "All right, where is she?" Calamity put up a sign that said: "Her throneroom will be on the top floor, at the end of the hallway of that top floor." Furrball nodded and they made their way up there, but then, once they got there, both saw a most unexpected and unpleasant surprise. And I'm not talking about how they discovered how lowdown, filthy, disgusting, gone to seed, broken-down, hovel-like and grim Sweetie's palace, as it turned out, looked and was, despite how Furrball had expected it would be lavish and/or high quality, though that came as a shock to him, too, despite how he considered who ruled the place and what it would mean, especially after all he'd seen outside of it, following his initial feelings of being startled. No, this surprise was the likes of Roderick Rat and Danforth Drake, right in front of Montana Max, all of whom were blocking the way to the door of Sweetie's throneroom. Monty said: "Well, hello there, you two. I don't believe I've seen the blue one of you, the cat, in my life. So why is he here now?" "Yeah!" Roddy agreed. "The coyote is obviously Calamity, but I never came across an Acme Loser, or anyone in this world, who was a blue cat of any kind!" "I do wonder who the fuck he could possibly be!" Danforth stated. "My name is Furrball!" Furrball shouted. "Furrball, huh?" Danforth asked. "Pretty hilarious name, if only for its sheer dumbness! Ha, ha, ha!" Roddy jeered. "You're a fine one to be talking about dumb, you dirty rat…" snarled Furrball under his breath. Then Monty said: "Yeah, it's a funny name, all right, but since neither he nor Calamity are part of Sweetie's empire rule, that means they're here as our enemies! Even if I've never seen this Furrball cat fellow in my life, I can tell he's not on our side!"

"And for good reason!" Furrball shouted. "You, Montana Max, as well as you, Roderick Rat and Danforth Drake, are, respectively, a spoiled rich kid with no morals who commits crimes and sins galore in the name of money and a couple of rotten, cheating snobs who think they're far above everyone else and that no one is their superior, even more than your girlfriends, the likes of Rhubella Rat and Margot Mallard, who you both shamelessly betrayed in this world in addition to banishing them to having to get drunk along with some other hapless ones! Money is the only thing that matters to any of you, and you think anyone with less than you've got is to be looked down on!" "Whoa, he sure knows a lot about us!" Roddy commented. "Damn straight!" a concurring reply from Danforth came out as. "All the more reason why he's gotta go as much as Calamity does, seeing as how those two are the closest thing to a threat to Sweetie's rule that we have here!" Monty commented. "Roderick Rat, Danforth Drake?" They turned to Monty and an instant later said: "Yes, Montana Max?" Monty then commanded: "Kill them both!" "With great pleasure!" Roddy and Danforth said in unison. They ran for Furrball and Calamity, but Calamity held up a sign that said: "Fuck you!" and when they were close enough, Furrball and Calamity in the most thorough of ways pummeled, respectively, Roddy and Danforth. Furrball leapt over the attempt to grab him by Roddy and kicked him in the back twice, then, after he landed and Roddy spun around, he slashed Roddy down the front with the claws on both forepaws and landed a big punch in his face and an uppercut in his chin.

Additionally, Calamity smashed Danforth over the head with his sign, and landed to nail him across the body with his sign, right before he tossed it aside and landed some hard punches and kicks into him, followed by a head-butt. Finally, he grabbed Danforth by the back of the head while Furrball did the same to Roddy and they slammed their respective opponents right into one another face to face. Literally. After their faces hit the other's faces, Roddy was fully knocked out and so was Danforth. "YOU IDIOTS!" Monty shouted, shaking his fist furiously. But he did no better than them when he ran in, yelling: "FINE! I'll fucking do this goddamned shit myself!" as Calamity and Furrball jumped to opposite sides and, just as Monty was in the right place and range for what they meant to do, they smashed their fists into opposite sides of his head. Monty passed out as he fell to the floor, and Furrball said: "So much for those three clowns." Calamity subsequently held up a sign which read: "Yes, and now it's time to see the head honcho behind all this! Tyrant Queen Sweetie!" So they ran their way towards the doors to the nasty, conniving canary's throneroom and pulled them open, one door pulled open by each of them, and they instantaneously saw Sweetie on her throne, in queen's attire aplenty. Right down to the scepter and the crown. Though the little girl and kitten who were now her assistants against their wills could be seen, both were looking unkempt, in poor shape and very miserable indeed. It broke Furrball's heart to see them this way and enraged him towards Sweetie at the same time, with the little girl's squeezing out of: "Help…us…please…" in speaking for herself and the kitten making it all the worse, but Furrball suddenly had no time to focus on that when Sweetie started talking like you'll now read about. She exclaimed: "What the fuck? Calamity Coyote? What are you doing here? And who's your blue cat friend? I've never seen that guy!" "You have seen me in my world!" Furrball shouted at her. "You and Elmyra would torture the shit out of me every last chance you got, whether it was unknowingly and carelessly in the latter's case, or intentionally for the sheer fun and pleasure of it for you! Let's not forget I only attacked you because I needed food, and before that, when I refused to eat you and minded my own business, you wouldn't stop torturing me because you wanted me out and kept trying to get me to eat you! When I finally got to snapping, you tortured me even more and I attacked you due to having hit my breaking point, in the next instant being thrown out of the home I was given! You started our feud and did all ya could to paint me as the villain, when you were all along!"

"I don't remember any of that, nor can you prove it!" Sweetie shouted. "In this world, no, since I was never born in this world, but in my world, all of it happened and plenty more. And in this one, I can see what you'd have done if it wasn't for me and/or if you had things purely your way! I can't believe even a bitch like you would turn Acme Acres into Sweetiesville and rule on over it like a tyrant queen!" Furrball yelled. "Hey, first of all, what's this 'your world' you keep going on about?" Sweetie demanded. "This is the only world there is, even if you've admittedly never been seen here before until now, so you can't be from around here or this planet. Secondly, this is the umpteenth time I've been labeled as a tyrant queen! It's happened repeatedly by tons of toons, and while I admit I have done some cruel, rotten things here or there and do rule rather harshly over Sweetiesville, plus I suppose it was pretty damn arrogant of me to rename Acme Acres after myself in that form, I'm still doing all I can to live up to my position! Yeah, I'm a mean bitch and sometimes abuse my power, but at least I do TRY to get things done! I only have two wings, you know!" She flew off of her throne and landed in front of her unexpected visitors, a second before going: "Look at all these complaints and upsets and decrying discrepancies and criticisms and whatnot!" Her voice got even higher and louder as she squawked: "Do you think that being queen of the world, Acme Acres or otherwise, is simple or easy for me?! I might have done things to earn SOME of my reviling, but the amount I get is just over the top and off the scale for things that I have difficulty doing! I think I'm going to flip and rip my own head off if I get one more criticism from anyone after this chewing out from the two of you!"

"Dammit, Sweetie, I've had it with this crap!" Furrball cried out. "For God's sake, I want to get back to my world!" "Your world?!" Sweetie cried out, unable to believe he was bringing up what she believed to be a total load. "Yes, my world!" Furrball replied. "Where you aren't the ruler!" Sweetie's eyes opened widely and she exclaimed: "Your world is a world where I'm not the ruler?!" "Yes, it is!" Furrball responded firmly. Sweetie tore off her queen robes, threw aside her crown and tossed her scepter away, then she flew onto Furrball and wrapped her wings right around him(to the extent she could, since she was so much smaller than he was)and begged the blue alley cat: "Please bring me with you. I beseech you. PLEASE bring me to this world where I am not its queen!" Furrball couldn't help but find it rich that Sweetie suddenly was perfectly happy to accept he came from another world now that she'd found out it was one in which she didn't rule Acme Acres or any other part of it, but he sighed, pulled her off and threw her to the ground, saying: "Sorry, bitchy bird. Nothing doing. I was brought here to be shown the mistake I had made in wishing I'd never existed, and now I know it as firmly as I've ever known anything at all. Me and Calamity have to go." Calamity then held up a sign that said: "Plus, if we brought you to our world, since there's another Sweetie there, it would mess up the important space-time continuum of our universe, especially since this world only exists because of a special device of mine." He held up another sign that said: "Furrball, I can tell you now see how vital and crucial you are to Acme Acres and the world alike despite how you get undeservedly treated like trash by a lot of ignorant jerks, though thankfully not everyone in Acme Acres." Furrball nodded and said: "I sure have learned such an important fact. I regret ever saying I wished I'd never come into existence." Calamity nodded and then held up a sign that said: "Come on, it's time to go on back to our old, own world. And say goodbye to this one forever."

He then, just before he and Furrball got teleported back there, held up a sign that said: "It should be noted, Sweetie, that your being left behind like this isn't just the only way this can be made to happen, but it's karma. Time to keep paying for all you've done and all that's happened because of your cruelty and misdeeds." Sweetie burst into tears like the pathetic, pitiful little wretch she was and buried her face into her wings, then Furrball and Calamity got teleported out of the alternate world by Calamity's special invention and back into their real world they were from, right back where they started in Furrball's alley. As soon as they were there, Calamity did well to turn his device off and looked to Furrball, holding up a sign that said: "We're back where we started, in our own world, and our trip is over. I'm glad you've learned your lesson." "We're really back? Everything is as it was and truly is?" asked Furrball. Calamity held up a sign which read: "Feel your ear and look at your tail." Furrball did just that, and both felt a notch in his ear and saw a bandage around his tail! He was back in the true world he was from, in which he was alive and most assuredly existed. "I'M BACK! I LIVE! I'M HERE TO STAY!" Furrball cried a ways on out. "I WILL NEVER DOUBT MY IMPORTANCE OR WISH I DIDN'T EXIST AT ALL EVER AGAIN! THANK YOU, CALAMITY! YOU DID THIS PERFECTLY! I WILL NEVER FORGET THIS!" He hugged Calamity and Calamity then looked to the screen towards the viewers as Furrball wrapped around him in a tight embrace. He held up a sign that said: "Hey now, wouldn't you react this way if you had just gone through all this and were back where you started and came from at last with new knowledge?" After Furrball finally let go of him, both he and Calamity could see that it was morning the next day by now, so they quickly made their way to Acme Loo. By the time they got there, they saw that the other toons were all lined up in front of the place and Fifi and Babs had, respectively, Danforth and Roderick in their clutches.

"Huh? What's this?" exclaimed Furrball. "Well, good morneeng, mon a mis." Fifi told the cat and coyote in front of her. "Let us feel you in on what's goeeng on hair." Babs then put across: "This morning, during the time you, Calamity, were helping Furrball here," She did a motioning of her hand towards Furrball to make her point, "we were able to find out just who had caused Furrball's unexpected accident and why. Namely, these two Perfecto Prep pricks!" "Turns out," Plucky informed them, "that they tied a rope to your tail, Furrball, while remaining unseen and escaped before anyone could see or question them, all the way back to Perfecto Prep. It was intended to break your spirit and drive you to suicide." "All because they were, like, sorer losers than the rest of the ones you beat in wrestling, or some junk." Shirley spoke. "Thankfully, Fifi and Babs here were able to beat the crap out of them after the evidence was analyzed and the deed they'd done was found out, and they're now being kept captive until the police arrive to see them arrested!" Fowlmouth stated. "The way they got tracked down and found was most unusual and unexpected, though." Hamton pointed out. Furrball was confused and so was Calamity, so in the instant, Buster said: "Ruby? Marg? Explain your part to them, please!" Rhubella and Margot suddenly showed up, wearing black coats and black sunglasses. Along with all their regular types of clothing. Both Calamity and Furrball were surprised, so they took to explaining quickly. "See, yesterday, after me and Margot here got to having something to make having to listen to our ex-boyfriends boast about what they'd done more tolerable, since we wanted no part of it, given we may be bad girls, but we're not on THAT level of badness, and we'd returned to Perfecto Prep, Roderick and Danforth were there waiting for us, and they bragged up an even bigger blue streak than we expected they would." "Which is saying a lot." Margot added. "Anyway, you can quite well imagine that we reached the point where we'd had enough and were vocal about it."

"But although we told them in a perfectly polite tone of voice that we wanted them to stop now and were tired of listening to them gloat about how bad they'd hurt you," Ruby went on, "they were having none of it and made that clear with their fists. Not only on our faces, but also on our bodies." "Got physical with us in lots of spots while vocally making it evident they would keep up their gloating as much as they wanted to." Margot spoke out. "Take a look." The two girls took off their shades and jackets, and both Furrball and Calamity were aghast at what they saw. Rhubella and Margot's torsos were covered with bruises, and they had two black eyes to go with those bruises, as well. To say nothing of bruises on their faces aplenty, which became more visible once the ones on their torsos and their black eyes did, due to the way the sun was shining on them right now on this particular morning and how it made things look. "Yeah." put in Ruby. "I know. Repulsive, isn't it? Hence the jackets and shades." They put their coverings back on and Furrball and Calamity gave a livid glare of vicious fury at Roderick and Danforth, the former of whom said: "Hey, the fucking bitches should have remembered their place and just kept on listening to us!" "It was for their own goddamn good, dammit!" shouted out Danforth. It was followed by Margot going: "So, you see, after that happened and we later found out that the Acme Losers were trying to figure out what had happened to Furrball, who'd done it and why, it should be no surprise we were only too happy to help them, in contrast to how we're usually just rivals and opponents for them in sports." "True." Ruby nodded. "And sure enough, we ratted…" Suddenly, she and Margot burst into laughter, but then Ruby continued: "…sorry, that was so, so funny and ironic, coming from me. Anyway, we ratted out Roderick and Danforth after letting all of the ones on the case know where they were, what they'd done and why, and it led to us going in to pretend to submit to them, only for the others to suddenly spring up and reveal they were all too busted!" "Once we revealed our sneaky betrayal to them, they threw such a fit that they tried to kill the first ones they next saw." Margot spoke.

"Zat happened to be me and Babs." Fifi told them. "But we handed their asses to them good." Babs put in. "Fifi did so to Danforth and I did so to Roderick." "After Babs and Fifi here were done," Ruby put across, I kicked Roderick in the balls, and Margot did the same thing to Danforth, both of us telling our former boyfriends and current enemies and abusers that we were through with them and were going to help get them arrested for their crimes." "Good job, and smart move, on their part, by the way." Buster spoke. "Like, totally." Shirley agreed. "Anyway, the rest of us played a part each in seeing to the undoing of their scheme," Sylvester put in, "and once it was all done, Bugs called the cops while Plucky and Buster kept an eye on, respectively, Danforth and Roderick, to make sure neither tried any more rotten tricks." "And it was only too easy for Ruby and Margot to help us understand what we needed to know to crack the case, since they'd been around, and, until recently, worked alongside, the two culprits for so long." a sign Wile E. held up read. Then Bugs stated: "Anyway, as soon as I'd gotten hold of the police, I let 'em know of everything and they told me they'd be at Acme Loo as soon as they could, and all of us were to take the defeated culprits there with us. We did just that, and even as we speak, the police are on their way, though the horrid traffic today has seen to it they'll take a lot longer to get here than they might have otherwise." "Even so, by now they should get here soon enough, and shortly, too." Gogo Dodo put across. Little Beeper held up a sign that said: "I take it, by the way, Calamity, that you were able to show Furrball how much he matters and help change his mind?" "I sure was, Little Beeper." Calamity's latest held up sign read. Beeper nodded and then Dizzy spoke for everyone present except Roderick and Danforth when he said: "That good to be knowing!" Okay, maybe not in the way the others would have said it, but you get the point.

Anyway, though Roderick blurted out: "If only our plan had worked, though! We were so close, me and Danforth, and frankly…" He pointed to Furrball and then snapped: "That pathetic pauper of an alley cat is worth more dead than alive!" "I AM NOT!" Furrball exploded. "I've in full learned that is not true, and your cruel plot is undone, as it hasn't worked on me and you will not get the chance to do it to anyone else, nor will your drake friend!" Gogo said: "Ha, ha! Well put, Furrball! And nice job sticking it to that rat bastard! Pun intended! By the way, Bugs told us that the police told him that, once they get here to take and put away Roderick and Danforth, both are gonna be in the slammer for an extremely long time!" "As in," put forth Hamton, "by the time they're released, all of us will be quite adults, albeit young adults, and have graduated from Acme Loo and gotten one job or the other." Furrball and Calamity's faces lit up, but then Monty suddenly shouted out: "RODERICK AND DANFORTH! QUICKLY! WHILE I'M YELLING AND THESE GUYS ARE FUCKING DISTRACTED! GET FURRBALL AND CALAMITY, THEN COME WITH ME! I CAN GET YOU TO BE PART OF MY MANSION'S RESIDENTS!" Everyone turned to Monty as, all of a sudden, Roderick and Danforth broke free, and Monty explained: "Yeah, I played along with all of this crap up until now when I saw the right moment to make my move! But in truth, I felt it'd be great of Furrball bit it, which unfortunately he did not, because it'd mean one less loser to be in this school, and I could organize a criminal group with Roderick and Danforth! Now I see an opportunity to make it so both the cat AND the coyote are killed, and they get away with their plot after all, albeit in a different way, and I become their new leader! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Just then, everyone turned to see Roderick and Danforth running at Furrball and Calamity, while Monty ran behind where it happened and far, far away from the ones he was with and had now revealed his betrayal to. He watched, but as it happened, Roddy and Danforth, despite their attempts to tackle Furrball and Calamity, were not only dodged by them, but Furrball landed behind Roddy, pulled him around to face him and beat the crap out of him, with fists, feet, claws and teeth alike, and Calamity, after landing behind and doing the same pulling around act to Danforth, also beat the crap out of him. With fists, feet and one expletive insult containing sign after another.

Then Furrball said: "Hey, Ruby! Margot! Want some payback time?" Ruby and Margot didn't have to do much thinking before they knew what was being offered, and Ruby spoke for herself and her avian friend when she said: "Lay it on us, guys!" Calamity held up a sign which said: "Here they come!" and he and Furrball tossed Roddy and Danforth at Ruby and Margot. It ended with Ruby punching Roddy hard and knocking him out, and simultaneously Margot doing the same to Danforth. As they fell to the ground unconscious, a shocked and horrified Monty let loose in a rage while shaking his fist: "YOU IDIOTS!" "That's for beating on us and trying to get us to participate in your shitty even by villain standards scheme before that." Ruby told those two unconscious creeps. "Word." Margot put in. Just then, Monty wailed: "FINE! I'LL SEE TO IT I KILL YOU TWO FLEABAGS MYSELF!" But just as he ran at them, Furrball moved to one side and Calamity to the other, and when he was in the right spot, they punched him on the sides of his head, knocking him out. Suddenly, they turned to see the police arrive, and as soon as this happened, everyone watched them come out and explained everything to every cop there was. It ended with Mary Melody going: "Anyway, as you can see, both the two original culprits, namely Roderick Rat and Danforth Drake, have been dealt with and defeated, and so has the one who is a traitor, Montana Max. All three by Calamity Coyote and the Furrball they tried but also failed, thank God, to see to the despairing and death of." "Thank you for filling us in on all of this along with your friends, young lady." one police officer said. "And you can be certain, as can all of the others here, that Monty's sentence will be just as long as Roddy's and Danforth's will. Well done, all of you. And good day. Congratulations to Calamity and Furrball for taking these three out, by the way, and to everyone who helped play a part in this." another officer an instant later spoke. "And make no mistake…domestic violence against their former girlfriends will indeed go in among the already big list of charges the rat and the drake have, and treachery will go in among the big list of charges Monty's got."

They nodded and Mary spoke for all of them when she said: "Our thanks, officers. We're glad we were able to nip their less than noble intentions in the bud." "Take 'em away!" Buster's words came out as. The police nodded and loaded in Monty, Roddy and Danforth after putting all three in cuffs and shackles, then placing them into their van and getting into the front part of said van to drive them off to jail. After the police had driven off, Fifi said: "Everyone? Before ze school day starts, zere is somezeeng I need to tell Furrball, now zat I have ze chance, with all of zis nice and ovair at last!" Furrball looked a bit confused, but when Fifi ran to towards him, she explained everything. "Mon a mi, zough I was, along weeth everyone, glad to hear zat Calamity had helped vous and you would be okay, I was more so zan most because…oh, sacre bleu…I'm just goeeng to fuckeeng say it bluntly and out loud! I have for some time now, despite hiding all of ze feelings zereof, been een love with vous!" Everyone around Fifi gasped, as well as Furrball and Calamity doing the same, and Fifi went on: "For various reasons, I did not tell you zat, but I have had a crush on vous for a long while now. I feel I should just admeet it outright here and now, seence I'm probably not goeeng to get anozer opportunity to do so!" Furrball then let out: "Whoa, Fifi…funny you should say that…because as much as it surprises me, what I'm about to say now will surprise you, as well?" "Vous don't say?" Fifi asked, confused. Furrball then said: "I have, for a long while now, had feelings and loving passions for you, but for reasons galore, I was unable to bring myself to do anything but hide them. But now that you've mustered up the courage to admit it, I have, too, and I'm in love with you the same way you are with me." Fifi's eyes opened widely, and she and Furrball, able to tell exactly what they'd do next, quickly did a huge embrace and then gave each other a kiss on one another's lips.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!" the unified response from everyone else present came out as, with the exception of Calamity, who simply as it happened held up a sign which read: "AAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWW!" Wile E. then let a ways out: "Oh, and that reminds me! Calamity, you did an excellent job helping Furrball see the truth about himself and making it so he reconsidered the wish he can now tell he didn't mean. I promised you an ability to talk like everyone else if you succeeded, and you have done so quite thoroughly. So, then. Now it's time for me to give your reward!" Calamity's face lit up and he jumped for joy, holding up one last sign, this one saying: "Oh, yes! My vocal speech reward! It comes to me at last!" Wile E. got to work and made the invention designed for Calamity to be at last given the ability to speak fluently and regular English, instead of needing to hold up signs. It was done soon enough, and he operated it so it would be used on Calamity, who promptly gained the ability to speak. After he felt it happened, he knew what he wanted his first spoken words to be and turned to Furrball, going: "Remember, Furrball, no cat is a failure who has friends and/or fans. Thank you for the new voice." "Of course, Calamity, and you're absolutely right!" Furrball replied. "And I can see where I stand by how many friends I've got, not to mention, now that I think of it, how many fans I've got among those who watch this show." "Oui, his amount of fans often rivals mon own, no?" Fifi commented as she and Furrball put their arms around each other's waists in addition to holding hands with their free hands. "Okay, lovebirds, you can do that with each other as much as you want after school, but school begins first, and now, all right?" Bugs let out. Everyone understood, those two or otherwise, and everyone entered the school.

While it was happening, Calamity said: "Wait a second! What about Rhubella Rat and Margot Mallard here?" "Yeah, they helped us and all, but while they're no longer Perfecto Prep students, where would they go?" Plucky pointed out. "Yeah, Calamity's got a point, and so do you, Plucky." Bugs said. "Say, Ruby? Marg? I know this might seem a bit sudden and all, given all facts, but, since you're no longer with Perfecto Prep after all of this, and since you haven't an alternate school to go to, seeing as how you left Perfecto Prep for all the reasons mentioned and how you wouldn't be welcomed back after all of what you did to help us by the others still there, would you two like to become Acme Loo students?" After something of a hesitation, since it was not only new to them, but something they never thought would even have a chance of happening at all, given their opinion of Acme Loo until recently, they eventually came to grips with how it was their best bet and the best offer they were likely to get for years, so they sucked it up and in the next instant, Ruby whispered to speak for herself and Margot: "Yeah…we suppose it would be our best bet to join you…fine…never thought we'd see this day." "Go figure." Margot then a second later whispered. So they were welcomed as new Acme Loo students, though they still of course cheated and/or acted like bad girls whenever possible, even if never reaching the level of badness Monty did while at Acme Loo/before becoming a criminal like Roddy and Danforth, in addition to how Furrball and Fifi had a beautiful future to look forward to with each other, and a truly elated Calamity loved being able to talk, something he had a hard time stopping thanking Wile E. for. After the day ended, Furrball and Fifi found out that Monty's money had been taken by federal authorities after he was arrested and divided up into various portions for various uses.

One of these was to give both Furrball and Fifi a semi-lavish home they could live in for the rest of their lives, something they eagerly accepted and thanked the authorities for. So they'd pack all of their belongings from their old homes(though in Furrball's case, these were few for a very obvious set of reasons)and they made their way into their new home, looking full forward to being happy and together forever, with Fifi finally having a true love and Furrball finally having a proper home, among other things that benefited both of them. That they'd learn the other big portions of the money that was once Monty's had been made to serve other significant and good causes around the world, Acme Acres or otherwise, only made it all the better for them. Ruby and Margot eventually became accustomed to their new school and classmates and became a bit better than they were before in the process. They, and all the old school(HA!)Acme Loo students had an ideal and easy street kind of life following this incident and case, especially the now very talkative and more likable and helpful than ever Calamity Coyote. Each in one way or the other, but you get the point. And finally, as for Monty, Roddy and Danforth, you can be certain they were the ones without any kind of at all happy ending, as they would be rotting in jail for an extremely lengthy time for their dirty deeds.

THE END

So, how was it for you? Please rate and review, Furrball fans, and especially those of you who like the Furrball X Fifi pairing! Oh, and just in case you're wondering…yes, what seemed like references to "It's A Wonderful Life" were indeed intended that way! The part of Mary being the maid of Elmyra? That was meant to be a nod, albeit something of a loose one, to Annie being the maid of the Baileys, her part played by none other than Lillian Randolph! The bar tavern thing was a reference to the bar that George entered into where people wished to get drunk quickly in "It's A Wonderful Life" during his trip to Pottersville. And Roderick saying that Furrball was worth more dead than alive? Only a total reference to Mr. Potter saying the same cruel, condescending sentence of evil to poor George Bailey! I chose Roderick because he thought up the scheme to try and get Furrball to kill himself despite working together on it with Danforth, by the way. And finally, the "no cat is a failure who has friends and/or fans" part is most assuredly a reference to George's thing in "It's A Wonderful Life" of "No man is a failure who has friends", just like Buster's thing in "It's A Wonderful Tiny Toons Christmas Special" was "No toon is a failure who has friends." An analogue of an analogue, you might call it. And of course, Calamity getting a voice after helping Furrball was a firm nod to Clarence getting a pair of wings after helping George. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this and I hope it was a good read for you. Especially if you love Furrball, which I do myself.


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